My Moments to Breathe

Sunday, November 17, 2013


This is what I think my new lungs will look like!!!!

As most of you know by now...I GOT MY CALL! I am currently sitting in Madison hooked up to a few machines just waiting for an operating room to open up. This seems to be a forever wait.

We got the call about 4:30 and I saw that special word and just looked at Jeremy and said something that I can't believe I said. HAHA...oops. But Kelly my coordinator was on the other end just waiting to give me the good news. And boy was it good news, I had a set of lungs and they weren't even high risk.

I said my goodbyes to Laila (again this is something you can NOT be ready for...still not sure I was/am ready for it.) But she was such an amazing girl full of smiles and running around the house saying I was getting new lungs and was going to be able to run with her. Sweet cheeks, I sure hope you are right. 

I am calm. I am scared. I am excited. I cry. I am hungry and thirsty. I am anxious. I am impatient. I am tired. I am overwhelmed with love. I am overwhelmed with thinking if this is real life. I am obviously so many things all wrapped into one. 

For those people who have asked YES my nails were polished, but I took them off once I got here so they could monitor me better. But my toes still aren't painted, so on the way out the door I said WAIT and went back to grab a bottle of polish so I could get them done this week. But maybe will have Jeremy bring me a happier color...I wasn't thinking how sad the color I brought was!

I didn't cry much on the way up here this time, and really I can say that for some reason I have stayed rather calm this whole time. Granted, yes, my emotions come in full force and I let it out in a cry and an apology to Jeremy. But I pray, I look at my Breathe Smile Breathe bracelet, and I remember why the heck I am gain a new life.  

We are long at another 3 hour wait and I have already slept for an hour, that should tell you either how calm I am or how exhausted I am. I got a small nap in today. But sadly I didn't eat much and was about to get ready to go out to eat when m y phone rang. So I am hungry and very thirsty and a big glass of cool apple juice sounds so wonderful. I know exactly what my first wish will be for when I wake up and can drink something. 

Jeremy and I have talked about all the little miracles that have happened this past week that was just perfect for a set up for the day (minus your ouchie MOM!) and thank the Lord that things are working out so far. Lets just hope this time when I wake up from the meds there will be new shiny lungs in me and a thumbs up from Jeremy and my Dad. I have already started a nice list of all the good coming from know because a new life with new lungs isn't enough HAHA. But here are some good things I came up with: I will get to drink 2% milk now, I will get my GTube out soon, I will get to go back to MI to see family more often, I will be feeling pretty good for Christmas, I will push Laila on the swing, I will get to walk the Great Strides this May. These are just a few guys!!

I am also thinking about as happy as my friends and family are, somebody elses family and friends are mourning right now. They lost a loved one. They are overwhelmed and have mixed emotions for a totally different reason then we do. Please keep them in your prayers too. And thank God that a family gave such a precious gift to me and others. 

Thank you all for the TONS of support I have had already on FB and texts these past few hours. I do plan on writing back and I want to thank all you personally, but right now the emotions have me and I can't sort fast enough. Hope you all understand! Next time I write I will hopefully, God willingly, have these new set of perfect lungs that will easily be able to push air in and out with no real effort.

I am now going to relax and try to get another round of some sleep. 

My biggest battle is about to begin.

Dear Lord, please wrap me in your arms. 


  1. I will hold you always in the palm of my hand. Isaiah 41:13

  2. THANK YOU for this wonderful bunch of words from you! God HAS you wrapped in His arms. May He bless your surgery. You have an ARMY of prayer support, so God aligned that perfectly, too. :) May He strengthen you now and for the recovery road ahead. <3

  3. Praying for your family and the other family ♥

  4. I'm tearing up with happiness for this happening for you! What Thanksgiving you will be able to give to him this year!!! I'm friends with Katie V in Florida and she introduced me to your blog and I have been reading for quite some time. Praying today for you, Jeremy and Laila, your surgeons and the family that offered you this new life!!!! God good!!!!

  5. Lots of prayers for you, Cassie! You are precious in the sight of your family and friends but, more importantly, in the sight of our Father in heaven!

  6. I got so excited when I read this - when I saw Gwen's fb post about an operating room I was wondering - scroll down fb and here you are - God's Blessing to you and your medical team.

  7. Oh my goodness! Cassie! I am so happy for you!! I will be continuing to pray for you and your family. Peace for everyone involved, those that lost a loved one and for your family as they anxiously await you during surgery. Also, for a fast recovery! Girl, you are going to rock this - God plus you equals success! Love to you! PS. my daughter is doing well. :) She is participating in a drug study, we think she may have the placebo, not sure. She has her regular appointment on Wednesday, that will tell us more. Regardless, our hope is really in the Lord!

  8. Cassie and Jeremy - We just heard about this from Renee Holm and had to visit your site. We hope and pray that all goes well and are very happy for you! HVL seems a long time ago! Take care and God bless!

  9. Cassie - You don't know me, but I have known the Doletzky family for a very long time, I can't tell you what a truly amazing young woman I think you are, the strength and faith you have is so inspiring. God Bless you and your family and the family who made such a wonderful decision to donate their loved ones organs.
    Faye Long